AMBIVALENT CARDS

 

*Naughty tarot trigger warning

Judgment

This card, no matter what deck it’s from, always feels "holier than thou". It should be called the smug smart ass I-told-you-so card. If anyone has done anything in their life that wasn’t the brightest thing to do, I hate to tell you, but this card will come screaming through the deck to tattle on you, just like that kid in grade school that no one could stand. You know the one, the snitch.

In spite of its very dramatic appearance, I give this card as much clout as the crumpled Kleenex in the bottom of my purse. Everyone has done something in their life that’s stupid. You can admit it, no one’s listening right now. When I turn this card in a reading, I have all I can do not to roll my eyes. Because of it’s very dramatic and high fa-lutin symbolism, I suppose I’ve had more than one querent wonder why I brush it off.

It’s because, when I’m reading for you, my concern is on your future and what’s going to happen to you from this point on. What are you going to do now, what direction will your life take, and what is your destination? What you’re going to do is much more important to me than what you’ve done. I could care less if you screwed the neighbor’s wife or cheated on your taxes.

The World

This card gives the impression of running in circles -- the card, not the querent. The World, which is often a beautiful card in most decks, leaves an odd taste in my mouth. It’s sneaky, and once in a while it feels as though it’s trying to slip something tricky into the reading, deliberately trying to throw a wrench in what I see, what I feel, what I know is there. This is one of my least favorite cards, and quite frankly, I’ve never gotten a good message or omen from it. It must be obvious that I don’t care for this tarot card, and I almost feel like I should whisper this revelation, as though the card might be listening and will send down a wave of negative energy to kick my ass.

The Wheel of Fortune

A change of luck, blah, blah, blah. This is so redundant, and it can mean many things, or it can mean nothing, but mostly it wants to give you a shot of artificial hope. The Wheel of Fortune and The World both have one thing in common -- the circle. And this card would just love to get you running in circles, all whipped up in a white heat, searching for that elusive idea of instant good fortune and “Lady Luck”. In the meantime, if you listen really hard, you can almost hear the characters on this card snickering in devilish delight. It’s appearance at a reading almost always inspires a surprised hopeful look from the querent, and so often I’ve wanted to say, “Don’t get your hopes up so fast.”

The Wheel of Fortune is often called the gambler’s card, and it’s main purpose is to tell us that life is one big fat frickin’ game of chance.

Temperance

In most decks I’ve seen, the character on this card looks just like the angels that graced the windows in the old Catholic church that was connected to the parochial school I attended as a kid. This card gives me the feeling of aloofness and social snootiness. The angel won’t even look us in the eye, pretending to be so intrigued by the chalices and their contents that she’s mindlessly pouring back and forth, back and forth. "If I don’t look at them, they’ll go away", she thinks. Quite frankly, and I’ve never told a querent this, but sometimes this card shows up simply to point out how boring someone is or how mundane their circumstances. This card most often just wants to tell us what a stinking rut our lives are in, how stuck we are by circumstances of our own making, and how goddamn boring we can really be.

LEARNING TAROT
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